Post-Folie Reflections (Part 1)

We woke up to a gray, rainy day here in Toulouse.  Perhaps this is normal; with spring time comes clouds and showers.  Yet the curious thing is that throughout this whole year Hockey Folie Wednesdays were almost always filled with sunshine.  Even when Wednesday mornings in February began cold and wet, I could almost always count on the sun coming out for the afternoon.  So today’s weather could either be chalked up to the seasonal weather patterns or the fact that there is no HF this afternoon.  I’m going with the latter.

While I’m slightly lost not being on a bus filled with French high school students going back to the suburbs of Toulouse on their half-day, there are great deal of good memories and experiences to keep me content this afternoon.  However, the positive parts of the program are more difficult for me to write about than certain feelings of doubt or regret.  On the train ride back south, I  encountered a feeling of emptiness in returning to a Hockey Folie-less Toulouse.  These feelings are understandable considering that, along with teaching English, HF is the reason that I was here for these months.  But I also have to wonder if one doesn’t always encounter a certain emotional hole when a program such as this one comes to an end.  Looking back on all the different sessions – some more successful than others – I have to wonder how or if I could have squeezed more out of the situation.  The basic question is what more could I have done to ensure that participating in a roller hockey program helped make a positive impact in the lives of these kids?  And to go even further, did I even succeed in making an impact?

The point is that everyone who worked on this helped to get the ball rolling.  When we started HF it was not with the idea that roller hockey, or sports in general, is going to fix all the worlds problems, let alone fix all of one individuals problems.  The idea was more that by offering a positive activity and environment to young people, and one that they can participate in for many years to come, you get the ball rolling for more positive events to happen.

I had to leave for a doctor’s appointment before finishing this post and right after getting back I received a phone call from the states.  Some new complications for next year’s program just arose and I need to try address it.  This post will be continued…

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